Sunday 19 July 2015

Date night

So a few years back, I worked as a nanny doing over night stays and Chris worked six days a week. This meant that Chris and I only saw each other two nights a week; this is when date night was invented. We would make sure that one night a week was just spent the two of us. We would either go out for dinner and drinks or just spend the night in together with a nice meal.

After renting a flat for a year, we moved back in with my Mum for about 8 months to try and save money to buy our own house and get married. This is when date night was taken to a new level. We made sure that more than one night a week we would do something just the two of us. This normally meant going out, as there was always someone else in at my Mum’s. We would go for drinks, dinner, or simply go on a walk together. We both felt it was important to spend this alone time together to keep the relationship fresh.

After moving into our house, date night became more sporadic. We made sure that most nights we ate at the dinner table without the TV on so we could have some quality time together. Date night then became more spontaneous. If the weather was nice, we’d pack a picnic and take the dogs with us after work. If neither of us fancied cooking we would go mid week to the local pub for some dinner.

Now our little man has arrived, the importance of date night has returned. Sometimes, if Jackson is taking ages to eat and is hard to settle, we often end up eating dinner separately and can even be on different floors of our house for most the evening! Obviously date night is less spontaneous now, as we have to arrange a babysitter. Jackson is 4 months and we have been on a few date nights, either just to a local restaurant or out for some drinks.

This week we went out for sushi and the cinema. It was lovely to have some alone time, even though all we talked about was Jackson and probably called my Mum to check in about 10 times! I love being a Mum but I also love being a Wife to Chris. Relationships can have their ups and downs and just because we have taken on new roles as Mum and Dad, we are still Husband and Wife and it is still important to work on that role.


Love Sophia xxx

Sunday 12 July 2015

A Week In Jackson's Wardrobe

Jackson has a pretty impressive wardrobe that most ladies would be jealous of (I know I am!).
Thought I would share his outfit for each day of a typical week. Get ready for cuteness overload!!!!

Monday
Top: Next
Trousers: Next
Socks: JoJo Maman Bebe 

Tuesday
Top: Mothercare
Trousers: Johnlewis 
Socks: Primark

Wednesday 
Top: Ralph Lauren
Trousers: Next
Socks: Next

Thursday
Dungaree set: Next

Friday 
Top: Asda
Shorts: Next

Saturday
Top: Gap
Dungarees: M&S

Sunday
Top:
Jeans: Asda
Socks: Converse

Hope you all enjoyed this. 

Love Sophia xxx

Sunday 5 July 2015

Opposite day!

So a friend of mine suggested that I do a birthing plan blog. I joked and said that I would call it ‘opposite day’ and thought, “as if I would share my birthing plan”. The more I thought about it, the more I thought, why not! Be warned, this is an honest post so it is quite long.  
During pregnancy, it took me a while to actually consider my birth plan; at that point I hadn’t heard many birthing stories so didn’t really have much information to go on. This soon changed though, as once I announced my pregnancy, everyone shared their birthing stories and in soooooo much detail. It all completely scared me.

When I was about 30 weeks pregnant, someone forwarded me a Youtube video of a Hypnobirth. It took me weeks to watch it due to the terror of what I was going to see. In about my 34th week, I finally had the courage to watch it. As cheesy/weird as it sounds, it was amazing. This was when my birthing plan emerged. I started Hypnobirthing lessons and we started writing the birth plan. It was quite simple; water pool, Hypnobirthing and as natural as possible, and we picked a Birth Centre as our preference.

The same friend that suggested I do this blog was also pregnant at the same time with twins; her doctors had booked her in for a C-Section. After most of our long phone calls, I would think how brave I thought she was and how calm she was about having a C-Section. The thought of C-Sections terrified me but all I thought was that it would never happen to me.

So on Wednesday 25th March, very early labour started with my partial waters breaking. I was unaware of this so carried on with my day. I went out for dinner that evening with a few friends and I started having stomach cramps, which wasn’t unusual, as I had been having them for the last 3 weeks on and off. 

Just as I went to bed I got a stomach cramp that didn’t go, and my initial thought was “Great, 40 weeks pregnant tomorrow and I have food poising”. I said for Chris to go to sleep, as this isn’t the ‘big day’. I had a bath and tried to get some sleep. 3 hours later, still no sleep, so I woke Chris up, as I didn’t feel right. He made me a cup of tea and ran me another bath while he rang the Birth Centre. They told me that I had to go to the Labour Ward; we still didn’t think that I was in labour but we took our bits with us anyway, just in case.

By 3am we had arrived at the hospital. We talked to the midwife and eventually she checked me and I was in fact in labour and 4 or 5cm dilated… amazing! However, the little pickle was back-to-back. I showed her my birth plan and said ‘can you please run the pool now’ she looked at me with sad eyes and said, “I’m afraid that you wont be able to use the pool due to your waters breaking yesterday”. Great, I thought, this is not going the way I thought it would.

We were taken to the ward, connected to the monitors and introduced to the midwife who would be looking after me. Due to the back-to-back position, I found it so difficult to lie down, so I just bounced on one of the birthing balls while Chris massaged my back. We had the Hypnobirthing music on and the lights turned down low. 

During this time I received a text from my friend that was expecting twins to say that she had her two beautiful baby boys a few hours ago, and they were born naturally!!!

After a while, my labour slowed right down. We negotiated lots of times but eventually they put me on a drip to try and speed the labour along, and with this they also gave me an epidural. Well that didn’t work! I stayed at 8/9cm dilated for hours. Later the doctors found out that Jackson was also looking up which is why the labour had slowed down. The doctor suggested a C-Section, to which I automatically said ‘NO’. Then I asked why he was suggesting it and he said that he was slightly concerned about Jackson’s heart rate. Well, at that point, I turned to Chris and said, “that’s it decided then”, and off we raced into theatre. I had to have a spinal block as I could still feel things with the epidural. The curtain went up so I couldn’t see anything that was going on and lots of people were running around the room. There was a lady near my head talking both Chris and I through the whole thing. The C-Section was quite a weird sensation; I could feel tugging but no pain.  
Then we heard the most magical thing, Jackson’s cry, and that was it as we both burst into tears of joy!!!



One thing I was worried about was my recovery, as the next day I felt like I had been hit by 10 buses. But each day I felt a bit better and I am lucky that I have a husband who just got stuck in straight away and once he went back to work I also had so many friends and family that helped me out. After 4 weeks, I felt mostly back to normal. I can’t compare my recovery to that of a natural birth but lets be honest, even though our bodies are made to give birth, it was never going to be a walk in the park! 

The NHS gets quite a lot of stick sometimes but for me, they were brilliant. Everyone I spoke to made me feel in control and as calm as possible and I have to give a big shout out to everyone at the Stoke Mandeville Hospital who were involved!!!

My one piece of advice for anyone who is pregnant or planning to get pregnant is ‘Hypnobirthing’. Even though I had the complete opposite labour to what I wanted, it helped me through the whole thing, keeping me focussed and relaxed. As for a birthing plan, I would still write one but be aware that it doesn’t always go as you might hope, and that’s OK!

My labour has not put me off having another child in the slightest and I would like to give my birth plan another go but if it ends up happening the same way, then it will be what it will be. All that matters is what you get in the end.

Love Sophia xxx


P.S – Clare from Blissful Birthing was our Hypnobirthing teacher and she was fantastic – www.blissful-birthing .co.uk - 07843055587